On Earth as it is in Heaven

 

Thomas Lee Abshier, ND
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Christian Counselor

Naturopathic Physician

Political Philosopher
Physicist-Theologian-Author

 

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Marriage & Personal Counseling

Medical Consultations

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1414 NE 109th Ave.

Portland, Oregon

(503) 255-9500
naturedox@qwest.net

 

Dr. Thomas Lee Abshier
Christian Counselor
With a Naturopathic, Medical, and Scientific Perspective

Marriage book by Dr. Abshier at: www.mycounselor.com

 

 

What can you expect from Christian Counseling with Dr. Abshier?

• Expect a rational, heartfelt, and thorough examination of your problems.
• Expect a problem-solution oriented approach, with each session bringing you a significant increment of completion toward your goal of understanding and action.
• Expect a thoughtful Biblically consistent solution that will challenge and inspire you to grow in Godliness and maturity as a person.
• Engage in an enjoyable and insightful analysis of the dynamics of your relationships.
• Deeply understand the forces which brought you to your current condition.
• Acquire new tools to help you break the hold of past hurts, vows, training, and heredity.
• Examine your understanding of scripture, and come to a stronger knowledge and commitment to your faith.
• Process those vague fears and dimly illuminated memories, and come to peace with your past.
• Examine the assumptions and decisions you have made about the meaning, purpose, and goals for your life.
• Compare the patterns of a happy, healthy, and in-love relationship with your own, and learn to make healthy changes in your job, family, and society.
• Explore the options available for making right and Godly decisions in the face of various moral dilemmas.
• Learn healthy relationship skills as you adapt to the unique personality needs of your family, friends, and business relationships.
• Examine where you need to grow as you attempt to master the lessons associated with each stage of life and develop missing life skills.
• Learn to develop your character and embrace the joy of life.

 

My Perspective on Counseling:

• From my training as a Naturopathic Physician and my degree as an Electrical Engineer, I bring a unique blend of Right and Left Brain therapies and approaches to the counseling session.
• If you have tried other counselors and would like to try a different style of counseling, this may be an effective approach for you.
• As Naturopathic Physicians we are trained to do counseling as one of our modalities of healing.  Resolving tensions associated with the various situations of life is important to maintaining and restoring the body's health.
• While it is not possible to change all situations, we can often change the way we perceive and respond to the disturbing circumstances of life.
• Sometimes our feelings and tensions are related to metabolic, hormonal, toxic, and other medical stresses. As such, I can look at each client as a whole, administering medical/naturopathic treatments as appropriate, if desired.
• As a Christian Counselor, people look to me to facilitate the processing and resolving of life and relationship problems by comparing the Biblical pattern of right behavior with their individual situations.

 

Marital Counseling:

• I will typically listen to one or both partners who have come to me for counseling for 1/2 hour to an hour. I typically spend 1 to 1 1/2 hours with an individual or couple. I try to allow enough time between patients so that I can spend more time if necessary.  If finances are a consideration I will limit the time spend in session accordingly to meet your needs.
• I look for the dynamics in a marriage that are out of balance and which may be causing stress.  I then confront, obtain agreement, and then offer suggestions for future behavior.
• I recognize that one partner may in fact be more responsible for the pain and upset in a relationship, but even so, the "less offending" partner can still grow and learn to respond properly in a difficult situation.
• I observe how the couple and individuals speak and respond to stresses and interactions in an attempt to identify personality flaws, habits, errors of reasoning, and character weaknesses.  I bring these issue to light for consideration, and if agreement is obtained of the need for change, I propose homework designed to produce the desired alterations in behavior and attitude.
• Records of success and failure are recorded throughout the week.  We review the report at the next meeting and redesign the plan to overcome any difficulties or failures.
• Because of my strong training in the experimental, rational, physical sciences, I think in terms of cause and effect and look for the forces operating in a system to create the problems a person is experiencing.
• Listening carefully to the problems a patient brings to the session allows me to form a metaphorical picture or map of the situation.  From this picture I am able to make a hypothesis as to the factors, forces, causes, and reasons for the upsets and problems in the marriage or life.  I then work with the patient as a team member and facilitator to overcome resistance to change as we develop new productive behaviors.
• Having deeply understood the problem's cause, it is possible to intervene and advocate for the development of new habits, attitudes, and resources.
• Usually it is necessary for both partners to make changes, but often one partner will often be required to make more changes, possibly because he/she is more capable or because he/she is more culpable.
• Marriage is a system that requires both partners to be healthy on many levels to manifest a fully mature marriage. The vitality of the marriage is related to the number of degrees of freedom that can be shared and appreciated (e.g. interests, activities, conversation, ability to listen and understand, time together, physical health, spiritual communion, children, property, work...)

 

Thoughts, Insights, Observations, Theories, and Experiences in Counseling

• Rapport Confrontation & Change
  The foundations of relationship and the counseling session
  Meeting your needs through understanding and polite conversation
• Romance to Resentment
  The unsatisfied needs of the soul produce hurt and estrangement
• Family Therapy
  Overview of the problems and strategies for solution
• Issues In Relationship
  Negotiating for needs, Handling angry outbursts
• Addiction Issues
  ACOA, Alcohol, Drugs, Sex, Music, 12 Step
• Offense Charting
  Resolving marital disharmony through accountability and feedback
• Sexual Dysfunction/Incompatibility
  Mind Map -- Definition, Diagnosis, and Treatment Strategy
• The Stress Response
  Mind Map Outline -- Cause, Effect, Treatment, and Coping with Stress
• Relationship Therapy
  An exposition of my counseling philosophy

 

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